I Will Fucking Die For Hip-Hop

I just read a bulletin from a Myspace friend of mine that read:

“Ive hated KANYE WEST for a long time.”

I just had to reply and give a point by point breakdown of how much I disagreed with this person’s opinion of Mr. West. Here is that message in its entirety:

I could not disagree with you more, good sir.

A few points to explain my disagreement:

1. “He is soo arrogant and so full of shit at times.”

Yes, Yeezy is arrogant. But you know what? He deserves to be. Goddamnit, he’s modest for how successful he is. Considering I can go to any high school in America and find a dozen guys who think they’re God’s Chosen Child because they can throw a football, Kanye’s arrogance is appropriate considering he’s a dude who has spawned some of the biggest hits of the decade (not only as a vocalist, but producer as well). And don’t even get me started on his trend-setting abilities, too. On a whole, dude deserves to think/know he is the shit.

2. “His last albums were not very enjoyable to me: minus a couple of good songs.”

All of Kanye’s previous albums are spectacular. May I point out that College Dropout and Late Registration are two of 19 albums to have received an XXL rating in all of XXL magazine’s existence. “A couple of good songs?” If you’re referring to the singles, there are more than a couple and they are more than good. Stronger was the biggest song of 2007, Can’t Tell Me Nothing was an instant classic, the Good Life was dope as shit, Gold Digger was a smash, Jesus Walks was adored by even my mother, and All Falls Down is irresistible.

3. “His latest album - 808’s & Heartbreak is actually really good - minus the singles, those songs do in fact suck.”

Actually, 808s and Hearbreak sucks, and the singles are the only good songs. Compared to his first 3 albums, 808&H is a disaster. The singles are good enough to get airplay, but I cannot see a single song on that album (despite the first track, which is the best on the whole joint) getting love from anyone. Kanye’s been known for being groundbreaking and original, but he went too far this time. Hip-hop is where he kills, and this album is not hip-hop. It’s like, I fucking love In N Out burgers… TO EAT. But if you told me I’d have to use a Double Double as means of transportation, that burger would be out of its league and unable to be enjoyable. Kanye as anything but a hip-hop star is unacceptable.

4. “When i heard this album I was a bit shocked at first, but then I learned to appreciate it and how original it actually was.”

I was shocked too, but in the same way I would be to find my father fucking my girlfriend. A true act of betrayal.

5. “I like how Kanye decided to give his album a whole ‘theme’ to be carried out through electro and expirimental type music.”

Don’t put quotes around the word “theme.” It makes you sound like you’ve never heard a concept album before. And there really isn’t a theme to this album. Sure, heartbreak, but isn’t that every album ever made? Most N’Sync songs are about love and heartbreak, but I wouldn’t call them conceptual musicians (except Justin, he’s the shit).

6. “But yeah, it sounds really good to me and ive found that Kanye west can do a whole lot more then just ‘rap’.”

Don’t put quotes around the word “rap.” Only three people do that: racists, old people, and old racist people.

7. “Hes pretty good at harmonizing his vocals in certain songs as well.”

That’s not him, it’s autotune. If anything, T-Pain is good at harmonizing Kanye’s vocals.

8. “Iono, I really like this album for some reason just for the sake of it being something different. Im a sucker for ‘different’ music. Hence the reason people look at my ipod and go ‘who the fuck is that?’.”

A) Just because this album is shit doesn’t make it different.

B) Being a “sucker for different music” usually means “sucker for musical snobbery and attention from my peers.”

C) Just because someone has never heard of a band on your iPod doesn’t mean that the particular artist is “different” or “experimental.” I only learned of the late-90s boy band “BB4” about 2 weeks ago (if you haven’t heard them, youtube that shit). Doesn’t mean they’re a musically innovative group.

D) If you aren’t a Tom Waits fan, then all three of my previous points are correct.

9. I cant stand everyone being the same and listening to the same shit just cuz everyone else is. 3oh!3 is a good group too. I listened to them when theyre myspace only had like 3,000 views and they had 900 friends. Now everyone and there mom is playing them out.

I can’t even explain how gay that sounded. The sound of two-scrotums slapping against each other sounds more heterosexual that your previous statement.

10. “Anyway what im trying to say here is that its good to be open to new music ALL THE TIME and to try and find something new every once in a while.”

Becoming a fan of a #1 album from a multi-platinum artist is not exactly “being open.” That’s technically following the crowd.


I hope that clarified things for you.

Goodnight and Goodluck.